Principles vs Rules

(I like this image of the trees... sometimes parenting is like this image...)

We've been talking about principles... and their importance. But what about rules? I'm not saying throw out the rules, but usually rules are there to keep the kids in line - to control them. Base your rules on the principles you've established. If picking up after yourself is a rule, mention the word 'respect' if that's what the rule is based on: respect for others, respect for your belongings, respect for the space in the house. If "don't lie" is a rule, do the kids know that integrity (honesty) is what's at stake when they lie, and that integrity is so important?

Bring your principles into the language of your parenting. Put them up somewhere in the house and make sure the kids understand why they are important and why you believe in them.